This Old Hair of Mine...

I started this post last night. I got the title down. I had a lot written in my head, but nothing actually typed on here. The next thing I know, I am waking up an hour later with the computer still sitting on my lap. I am just thankful I didn't post anything embarrassing. This time. :)

So my hair. I have had a love/hate relationship with my hair most of my life. Pretty much all of it. And mostly on the hate part. We don't get along. I have very fine hair. Ponytails are out...the hair scrunchy slides right out. Forget barrettes or any cute accessory. And curls? Not a chance. My hair is straight (but not that pretty movie star kind of straight where it is perfectly brushed and stays that way). I used to torture myself with perms trying to get even a wave. I gave up. Even now, I will occasionally curl my hair in hopes that it looks somewhat decent for the day but usually by the time my toes step out my door, it is back to its scraggly straight self. Sigh. (And double sigh for my dear daughter who inherited my hair!) Even the color is just "blah". When I was younger, it was a blonde, blonde, almost white blonde. As I have gotten older, it has turned to a "dirty blonde". Really, how can you take much pride in a color that contains the word "dirty"? Exactly my point. The one thing I do have on my side is that if I am graying at all, I cannot tell. I have found one gray hair in my lifetime. I joke that my kids are turning me gray but so far, they haven't done much damage.

So...and this post really has a point to it...

In the spring I noticed my hair was getting fairly long (for me). I have never had my hair short short but I usually don't let it get too long because it is so fine (not fine as in "oooh, she is fine" but fine as in not holding a thing in it fine), it just hangs there. I heard about a professor who was growing his hair out for Locks of Love. A male professor. His words when asked about it were (I am totally condensing because I don't remember the exact words) "I thought I should walk the walk." It made me stop and think.

I have been suggesting to my girls for some time that they donate their hair to something like Locks of Love for children with cancer. The hair is used to make wigs. One of my students did something similar a couple years ago; I was so impressed with her giving spirit. The problem is that one still doesn't fully understand what that means, and the other isn't about to cut her hair. She loves ponytails. That is when I thought, "Why do you tell your girls to do it when you haven't done it yourself?" So I made the decision to not cut my hair. After much research, I decided to donate to Pantene's Beautiful Lengths program because only 8 inches are required rather than 10 that Locks of Love requires. (This program actually makes/donates hair to ADULT cancer fighters) The main stipulations are that the hair cannot be chemically treated and cannot be gray. I knew this was the time since who knows when I will suddenly be gray. Especially with this crazy life. :)

I will admit, this summer, I questioned several times why on earth I was doing it. I cannot stand the weight of the hair on my neck. It drives me crazy. I have been throwing it up in a clip every chance I get even though it doesn't look nearly as chic on me as most women. (Chic is not a word associated with me anyway :)

Yet when I was tempted to cut it, I had someone in the back of my mind. A teacher from my school found out this past spring that she had pancreatic cancer. Mrs. P is an amazing woman with more strength and humor than I ever dream of having. She is fighting the cancer with everything she has. If you see me and see a pink band on my arm, it is my reminder to pray for her. I have not taken it off since I got it. After all, she can't take off the cancer, why should I take off a rubber bracelet that reminds me of her? (I do wash it on my arm in the shower :) Surely for women like Mrs. P, I could overlook a little annoyance of hair hanging on my back. Then as the summer came to an end, our faculty suffered a second blow when another teacher found out she has breast cancer. Mrs. B is another amazing woman with a fun sense of humor and a fighting spirit. She began her treatments last week.

It was never my intent to really share any of this (about my hair growth) because I don't want to showcase what I am doing. I really planned on going to my hair dresser when my hair was a little longer and having her cut the ponytail, then I would send it in to Pantene. However, an upcoming event has detoured my plans.

Pantene/Beautiful Lengths has partnered with the LPGA tour (as in lady golfers) to hold a Beautiful Length event in our area. They have also partnered with our school to raise awareness of cancer and to support our teachers, Mrs. P and Mrs. B. On September 8 at a local convention center, there will be a hair cutting event for those donating hair. Our school hopes to have our own little section. I think my hair is there. I think I am right at the required length, though it is going to be shorter than I usually cut it. But it will grow. (Hubby may miss it though :)

If you are in our area and have untreated long hair and would like to donate it to a good cause, you can come join our group! You can send an e-mail to nwabeautifullengths@yahoo.com for more information. You can also visit the website at www.beautifullengths.com for more information.

Quick bit of information...it takes 6 ponytails to make one wig!

I wish now we had waited to cut our daughter's hair; she probably was close on length. Her long hair was driving me crazy too (even though hers is everything but fine!).

I can only hope that one day my own kids will want to give from the heart. I hope that is the legacy I leave with them.

And what do I hope even more? That a cure would be found. That cancer would be wiped away, as well as the tears of many who watch their loved ones fight it.

Prayers,
Reba

Empty Nest Syndrome

Here I am, just about out of picture room (then I have to pay for space on Picasa) with a bunch of cute kid pictures (or at least I think) waiting to be posted, and what am I doing? Showcasing a couple of baby swallows who made a HUGE mess on my front porch. Where are my priorities? :)

As you may remember, if you have read on here at all, we found a baby swallow in our flowerpot at the beginning of the month. We cared for it for just a few hours until my Superman hubby came home to put the scrawny little baby back in its nest. I guess we bonded in those few hours... I really thought it was going to die. But it didn't...at least not on our care. And I guess I could be wrong, but I am pretty sure it was one of the two swallows we followed the next month...

Here is Baby Bird we discovered. We watered him frequently and watched it get weaker and weaker...I had no chewed up worms for it to swallow!For a few days, we saw nothing in the nest. The good news is that there was nothing on the ground either. :) Then one day, we saw not one but TWO heads peek over the nest down at us.

They were probably calling for momma who was never far from sight. She would fly back and forth in front of our house, getting closer and closer each time. That is how we knew it was time to US go back in the house. I worried a time or two about getting pecked though I certainly couldn't reach those babies if I had wanted to!Such scrawny little birds!
Hmmm, apparently worms and such are full of calories. I think this picture was taken just two days after the one above. How did they grow so quickly?

They looked more like little hawks to me than swallows.
Getting ready to fly the coop!
Growing, growing...

Gone.
I knew this day was coming. I knew it was time for them to fly away. But I will admit, I was still a little sad the first time I saw the empty nest. It is a lot like life to me as a mom. You watch them grow those feathers. You nurture and love on them. Then one day they are just gone. And you are happy they have grown and spread their own wings, but you wonder, where did the time go?

And you are just a little sad that it is gone...
Farewell to our feathered friends. We hope we meet again! (Just stay off my porch OR learn how to clean up after yourself!)

More later,

Reba

Teamwork

We get asked fairly often how we manage life with four kids and busy schedules. I always smile because we have so many friends with more than four kids and probably even busier schedules. Yet there are some days (like yesterday/today), I wonder, "How DO we do this?" One word. The answer is one word. Teamwork.

Let's take Monday for example. It was my first "real" day of school with my own class. So I had to get up a bit early to get going. My students come to my room earlier on the first day than other days. I got up to get ready. Meanwhile, my other half was up getting the kids going for the day. He woke up the big kids, and he laid out clothes for the smallest one. Then he got breakfast ready. After that is done, he went to get ready for the day, and I was on hand to deal with any issues, like spilled milk (thankfully none this time) and brushing hair.

Around 7 (which is not our normal time to leave), I gathered up the girls. They brought their breakfast with them, and we headed to school. About half an hour later, Mark took the boys to their respective schools. The funny thing is that our oldest's school is very near our house and is only a couple of minutes away from my school but with traffic, it can take a very long time to get there. So if Mark is in town, it is better for him to chauffeur than me. (I have a set time to be at work; his day doesn't start quite as early though I am sure it could....)

After school, the girls played in my room while I made sure my students got home. A little bit later, the middle schooler showed up; a friend had picked him up when she picked up her own child. Then we flew out the door, my schoolwork in hand, to pick up our preschooler.

Since my grandmother who has been visiting was leaving tomorrow (Tuesday), we stopped by my parents' house to say good bye to her. We visited for a bit, the kids eating a snack and sharing the news of their day. Then we flew out the door and headed home.

As soon as we got home, I had the big kids bring me any and all paperwork, then they went off to play I rushed around getting dinner (lasagna in a bun) ready. Just as I finished up the prep work and got the meal into the refrigerator, I heard the garage door letting me know Mark was home. I ran out to my car and "tagged" him to be it for a while.

I headed over to the school. It was Open House/Parent Orientation for parents of first/second graders. So I got to take off my teacher hat and be a momma instead (though I never truly take off the teacher hat, especially since I knew some of the parents in the room). While I learned about first grade expectations, Mark bravely took the whole crew to our son's football practice.

As soon as I was done at the school, I stopped by the house and put our sandwiches in the oven, then I headed right back out the door to rescue Mark from the younger crew. He stayed at practice while the other kids joined me. We stopped by McD's for a coke which I highly needed at that point :), then returned home.

We ate a hearty dinner. Then I started the bath/bedtime process for the kiddos. Meanwhile the boys came home and had their dinner. (I am happy that our son is involved in something. I really am. However, I TRULY miss having our family meals!) I read with the younger kids, then between Mark and me, somehow everyone finally went to bed.

Once they were down, I got to work with school paperwork for the kids while Mark worked on the dishwasher. Meanwhile, I also threw a load of laundry in (I am doing the load a day technique...it works pretty well!) and wrote out a list which my sweet husband took to the store to get some needed foods for me for school. While he was gone, I checked e-mail and worked on some school notes.

Shortly afterwards, we collapsed exhausted.

Teamwork is the only way we can do it. The only way.

More later,
Reba

It's Getting Easier...

I have been thinking a lot lately about how life is slowly getting easier. Let me clarify...parenting. At least in the physical sense. I don't think emotionally it will ever get easier.

I realized it this summer. On our trip to the beach, I had to pack no diapers or diaper bag. We didn't take the pack and play (we went the sleeping bag route...he still isn't quite ready for a bed!). We didn't even take the stroller this time. The older kids could at least put outfits together for me to double check and pack for themselves. It was just a little easier...

Now when we go out for dinner (like we did tonight/last night depending on how you look at it), we just go. We don't pack a diaper bag or bring bowls of Cheerios to tide them over. We don't bring a bib (though sometimes that is still needed; tonight we used a napkin to protect the shirt). We just go. Even the wait is getting easier as our youngest gets more interested in coloring instead of waiting for food to arrive.

While I am still a stickler for naps when we are home (or at least a quiet time for the older kids), if we need to go somewhere in the afternoon, I know that we can survive (though there may be an earlier bedtime in the future...). That has opened up a lot more possibilities for us.

Even the bedtime routine is getting there. The oldest three can get ready for bed completely on their own (though we still read and pray together). And the youngest can get ready for bed with just a little supervision.

It is getting easier. Slowly but surely.

Reba

Feathery Follow Up

I am totally cheating on my update, but last night was very busy with Open Houses.

I just wanted to do a very quick Feathery Follow Up. Our baby swallows are getting SO big. They look like they are just about ready to fly away. I have such mixed feelings about that which is ironic considering I had my baby start preschool and have my oldest start middle school this week. I know they are about ready, but the day I walk out to check on the babies and they aren't there...well, it is going to be a sad day. But it is almost time.

Life is funny that way...

Reba

Our Testimony

First off, I wanted to say thank you for thinking about us today. Our son had a great first day (at least from his viewpoint) of preschool. He excitedly told me all about what he did, what he ate for lunch, etc. He was WIRED by the time we got home. I will try to remember to tell you a little more about our afternoon together (after school) tomorrow. For tonight, I am wiped out so I am cheating a little bit on this entry.

Recently our church children's director asked for our testimony about why we chose to adopt. We have some families at our church who have just adopted or are adopting. The director asked for a short article to share in our children's ministry newsletter. Because of some miscommunication, I received the request the day before it was due. It also happened to be the week of swimming lessons. I thought I would share this tonight since I am too tired to think of anything new and original. :) Forgive any errors. I really had less than 24 hours to type it up. (The newsletter showed up in our mailbox like two days later, story intact.) On a side note, some adoptive parents don't like questions about the adoption. I really don't mind, though it seems to bother our daughter if anyone asks in front of her (I try to be subtle :). If you do ever wonder about the adoption process, just leave a comment and ask. :)


"Why did you choose to adopt?"

We get this question often.

I never quite know what to say, so I always just shrug my shoulders and say, "It is a God thing."

In the summer of 2005, we were a family of four. We had a son and a daughter. I often heard that we had the "ideal family" (a boy and a girl). In my mind, our family was complete. Yet that summer, a series of events changed our hearts and our minds. I stumbled upon an adoption waiting list website. Our church went on a mission trip to Mexico and came back with many pictures from an orphanage there. One day in extended session, we had the privilege of speaking with one of the children who was adopted; we quickly saw how her life had been changed. A seed was planted in my heart.

After seeing the photos from the Mexico mission trip, I was positive we needed to adopt from Mexico. I stayed up late at night researching adoption in Mexico only to discover it is very difficult and very challenging and often unsuccessful. I was positive that was what we were supposed to do. One night I went to bed and just prayed to God, "Please change my heart or change my mind!" The next day when I awoke, I returned to that adoption photolisting and decided to look at Guatemala which was at that time open to adoption. I am almost positive our daughter's picture was the first picture I saw. My heart was changed. After much prayer and discussion, we decided to pursue international adoption. Though we were sure that our opportunity to adopt our daughter was slim (since hadn't done a lick of paperwork at that point), God again, as He did MANY times throughout our process, demonstrated His faithfulness and love when we accepted her referral a short time later.

It would take days to share all we learned throughout the adoption process. We came to rely on God in a completely new way. We learned more than ever that God is in control as we watched paperwork get bounced around the government bureaucracy in both countries. We felt the power of prayer through the prayers of our church body, family, and friends. We were able to share God's faithfulness through our family blog. Our life verse, Proverbs 3:5-6, was uttered and recited many times throughout our process.

In August 2006, we traveled to Guatemala to bring our daughter home as our new daughter and a new American citizen. A year and a half later, we returned to Guatemala for a special Christmas gift...our new son.

Parenting adopted children has not always been easy (nothing about parenting is easy!); it presents unique challenges to us as parents. However, Mark has often said, "We did not bring these children home to love us but for us to love them." I am reminded daily who WE are as adopted children of God through the lives of my own children. And we are thankful for the gifts we have been blessed with, because children are truly a heritage from the Lord.

More later,

Reba

Getting Back in the Swing of Things

It has been a quiet week in bloggerville. I have gone back and forth debating about whether I needed a break or not. But in the end, it is a good way to unwind, to reflect, to remember. So here I am.

I am officially back in school. Our first day was a day of meetings and getting back into the groove. We did take a train ride which was fun (it involved Arkansas history lessons for the teachers :). And it is always good to be back with my team. It is home away from home. Yesterday we were granted the privilege of working in our classrooms. All day. It was wonderful. I got a whole lot accomplished.

At home, we are getting back into that school routine too. Earlier bedtimes. Getting up earlier. How to do it all. Okay, honestly, I haven't learned how to do that yet.

To help get back in the school routine, I am going to make some changes this year (I hope). Kind of my New Year Resolutions.

Things like...

• doing a load of laundry every day. FlyLady recommends it, and I hope to keep it up. Surely I can do it. I have really be making more effort in this area. Most of our marriage, Mark has done at least half (probably over half) of the laundry. And he does it without complaint. However, I want to be more wifely and do more of it myself. We will see. It has worked so far.
• planning meals each week and grocery shopping once if possible. I used to try two weeks but then I had to have two carts. I will stick with one for now. The good news is sometimes I plan for a meal then we have a change of plans (like unexpected football practice), so then that night's meal can carry over to another week.
• Coupons. I need to get back to coupons. I need to be more frugal. I am fairly good about cutting coupons out. I am not so good about remembering to take them with me. Hopefully I will get back into that. (I used to do it and loved that feeling of accomplishment)
• Exercise. My goal is to spend 15 minutes in the morning on the elliptical as I slowly wake up. I hope to use that time for prayer (which is another area to work on in life). Then if I get more exercise in the afternoon, I am that much further ahead. If I don't, at least I have gotten a little bit in the morning!
• Prayer. See above. And reading the Bible. I don't do well with "quiet times" in the summer. And honestly, since gaining a fourth child, I don't do well with them really any of the time. I need to do better. I can feel it in my life. I am missing something, and I don't want to be. I have put God on the backburner too long.
• Organizing. If I can just do one little organizing job a day, then hopefully eventually it will show in our house!
• Attention to the kids. I want to give them more of me when we get home beyond homework supervision and refereeing their arguments. Especially the younger two. I will admit, this one is a struggle. Not that I don't pay attention to them. It is just difficult to do when we first get home. I tend to settle in with the computer or housework, just to find some downtime (which I have NONE of). But sometimes that needs to wait.

I am sure there are many more things I can add, but I will stick with this for now.

I better get going for now. The kids are a little wound up. The longer I stay in here working, the higher the chance that someone is going to get hurt. Yep, the crying has already begun...

More later,

Reba