Thursday, March 3, 2011

Little Nuggets of Wisdom

This year I have a big birthday coming up.

What did you say?

Why, of course it is the big 3-0. Wink, wink. :)

Anyway, I was talking to a co-worker/friend who is having the same birthday as me, just a little bit earlier. Anyway, we were both saying we really thought we would feel wiser by now. I remember looking at my mom at this age (and even younger) thinking she was (and is) the wisest woman I know. So here I am, wondering where all this wisdom is. Deep down, I still feel like the same insecure little teenager I once was. Just in an aging body.

But maybe, just maybe, as I reflect, I have learned a thing or two along the way.

Here are a few Nuggets of wisdom. Feel free to share your own via the comments.

  • The times I am needed the most by my children: When I am in the bathroom and when I am in the shower. Why?
  • Sometimes "Because I said so" is just the perfect answer.
  • I need to learn to appreciate my kids for who they are rather than feel disappointed in who they aren't.
  • No matter how much you love them, there will always be a hole in the heart of the adopted child for their birthmother. Some feel it more than others but it is always there.
  • Yes, you can love a child who is not biologically yours just like they are biologically yours.
  • The Roomba was an excellent addition to our household.
  • If we aren't using it, we need it to go away. We have a standing bag for Goodwill next to our door. I fill it as I find things.
  • Chores are good for kids. I wish we had started even earlier, but better late than never. The kids can empty the dishwasher, refill it, sort their clothes, put away their clothes, take out the recycle, clean off the bathroom counter, and help set the table.
  • Along with the benefits of chores comes the responsibility and time needed to teach.
  • Homework time goes much smoother if there has been a little downtime after school (like time outside to play).
  • The best conversations and information comes on the drives home after school...I learn a lot that way.
  • My kids think their bedtimes are a drag...nobody has to go to bed as "early" as they do. How did I get this little bit of wisdom? They tell me daily.
  • I need to get my exercise in before I chill out behind the computer at night. Once that happens, I am toast.
  • Our love (as in marriage love) has grown over the years (at least for me it has, can't speak for him :) though we show it in totally different ways these days.
  • You just have to live the life you are in right now. A romantic getaway for a week would be divine but (besides the financial constraints) the practicality of having someone watch four kids for a week is not very likely. So instead we have late night dinner dates (at home with take out) or cook a meal together. Not the same but it works for us at this point in life.
  • No matter how old I get, I will never lose that mothering instinct and the desire to hold a newborn. Even if I had 20 kids, I still would want a newborn in my arms. Instead, I need to wait for grandchildren in the far off distance...
  • Just be patient, this too shall pass. And something as equally as "un-fun" will likely take its place...
  • Always have extra laundry detergent, milk, and bread on hand. They will not go to waste.
  • Check backpacks as soon as they come home. Sign it and send it back or it may get buried on your counter.
  • Every child is different. They all respond in different ways to parenting techniques. You just have to try and see what works.
  • Tastes change...in food, in clothes, in furniture.
  • You can teach your children all of the right things to do, but in the end, they make their own decisions. I can't necessarily take the blame for the choices THEY make any more than I can take the credit for the choices they make.
  • Sometimes moms need more than six hours of sleep.
  • I could think of a lot more of these but I need that more than six hours of sleep...
Better go. :)

More later,
Reba

2 comments:

  1. Amen! You are indeed a very wise woman!

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  2. Sorry I am behind in commenting!

    I totally agree with you on the love (marriage love) growing. As I have gotten older, I realize that love isnt always that "feeling" that you got when you were younger and its not a place that you fall into and out of. Love (in marriage and the love we have for our kids and other family members) is the things we DO for each other. Its liker our service to those we care about. There are things I dont necessarily like all the things I do or need to do for others (Clint) but I do them because i love him. I think thats where some of the wisdom comes in. There are days i dont necessarily feel "in love" with him, not because of him or anythign he has doen, but just with life's daily stresses, but the LOVE, the bond, is always there. And thats what pushes us to do the things we do for all those we love, just because we love them.
    You are wiser than you give yourself credit for. You always give me things to think about! Thanks!

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Sweet Words of Wisdom