Sunday, January 8, 2012

I Don't Have Your Eyes

I Don't Have Your Eyes
by Carrie A. Kitze, illustrated by Rob Williams

Last fall, on one of the adoption boards on Facebook, someone offered to send out a book about adoption. All they asked was that we give a review of it.

Sure enough, a few weeks later, a book showed up in my mailbox.

Unfortunately, it was right around the time of holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas).

The book got pushed to the side.

Until this weekend.

I have been determined to see this through to the finish.

So I finally opened the envelope, pulled out the book, and read it.

It didn't take long to read it. It isn't wordy.

But it says so much.

As a mom of two children adopted internationally, I can appreciate the message of the book.

If you know us at all, you know that our two youngest children look NOTHING like me. We look more like an Oreo cookie together. I am about as pasty white as they come, and they both have this beautiful brown skin (which really does get darker in the summer). I have blonde hair, blue eyes. They have brown (almost black) hair and eyes.

Yet though we look different, that doesn't mean we have no connection.

Sometimes one of my children will make a face that is identical to one I would make. I hear my words coming from their even more of a Southern accent than I have.

I see little character traits that remind me of myself. Sometimes good. Sometimes bad.

And that is what this book so nicely puts into words (and pictures).

"I don't have your ears...but I have your way of hearing those in need."

We may not look alike, but that doesn't mean that we don't have a connection. That we don't share some ideas, some thoughts, some behaviors.

What I also like about the book is that it gives a glimpse of the power of a parent.

It shows what we can pass down. It doesn't matter if we are related by blood or not. We are making a difference in the lives of our children. It is our decision whether it is a positive difference or a negative one. Our words, our reactions, they all have an effect on what our children learn about the world.

Another positive about the book: the illustrations. I love how different races/ethnicities are represented. And one of the pics looks just like my son to me. I don't always find that in adoption books.

I haven't read the book with my kiddos yet. I think it (the meaning) will go over my 4 year old's head but I think he would enjoy the pictures and talking about how we are alike and different. The 7 year old? I think she will get an idea of what it means. And I think as she gets older, she will treasure these words in her heart.

I look forward to sharing it with her!

PS The book can be purchased at, Barnes and Noble, and through their website

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for posting this, Reba. I am glad you enjoyed the book.

    Don't be surprised if your 4 year old gets more than you might think at their age out of the book. I wrote it for a 3.5 year old (the age of my now 13 year old at the time I wrote the book) because kids pick up on differences and want to fit in. Looking the same is the easiest way to fit, and pre-schoolers get that. Congratulations on your lovely family and have a great new year!


Sweet Words of Wisdom